Since this is our last official class, I decided I had to post something! I can only come to the first half hour of class and it’s hard to write my own stuff, but I enjoy reading everyone’s blogs and wish I would visit this site more often.
Here’s the thing–this Saturday I am going to a funeral and then a memorial. Since both these events are on the same day, I find myself thinking of grief and how we mourn in the 21st Century in the U.S. The funeral will be a traditional Chinese-American funeral with a procession, paper placed in the coffin before it is closed, and symbolic paper money burned. Before we leave we’ll be given an envelope of coins to buy and eat a sweet before we go home. My friend Mike has taken care of his ailing mother for over 8 years and I know Mike, who is very modern and hip, wants to honor his mother and her traditions.
Later I’ll go to my good friend Angie Foo’s memorial who had the strength and courage to not only fight 5 years for her life and planned her memorial. For some reason I saw her planning as also a way to help us cope with losing her. Angie was like that taking care and loving the people around her.
Here’s a poem I wrote.
Thinking of Angie
When death strikes we sometimes
make it a beautiful thing
A spirit rises
A chill rises up from the body
A chord in harmonious melody
Is if on its own
Speaks peaceful passing
Surrounded by love.
We wait months
For a memorial
As family and friends grieve
Hidden on their own.
We wait months
To share our grief
Then find poems and
Flowers
Spill out a ritual now called
Celebration
Of life.
A chill rises up
On its own
Reaches high
Beyond the night sky
Breaks through
The ozone
No longer buffered by
Earth’s air.
We say we see her angel bending
Over us.
This is our custom
New after eons of wailing
Tears streaming always
Invisible or not
We sing
Not afraid to change
The old ways
To testify to a
New found beauty
I see these two tributes to lives, culture and times as important to all of us as human beings. But nothing takes away the grief.
